We married young, in love, and almost entirely unprepared. Not because anyone lied to us — but because nobody handed us a map.

Six conversations belong before the wedding: money and debt, family of origin, expectations about roles, faith practice, intimacy, and how each of you handles conflict when tired and outnumbered.

The one most couples skip is the sixth. Engaged couples rarely fight, so they assume conflict will be manageable. Then the first hard year arrives and they discover they each learned entirely different scripts as children — one shouts, one disappears.

Talk about it before you need it. Ask: what did conflict look like in your house growing up? What did your parents do when they were angry? What do you need from me when you feel unheard?

A wedding takes a day to plan. A marriage takes a lifetime. Spend some of the planning energy on the part that lasts.